Oh crap! You need to learn how to "pull the trigger."
Listen, I have mild Ausperger's, for most of my teenage years and early adult life I used Alcohol to get over the paralyzing anxiety that I had in social settings. I would just fake it most of the time. The old "fake it until you make it" mentality. My game was solid, but it was totally fake, I was like a social robot, or worse, a sociopath. I can really empathize with your fear of the kiss. Sometimes what I do is I just act. I just assume a role, put on that character and bs my way through it.
It sounds to me like you are paralyzed by some sort of fear caused by whatever happened with your 1 evil ex. Somehow everything you do is shadowed by her. If I had to bet, kissing isn't the real problem, it is your evil ex*.
Basically, before I get all ADD in this post, my advice is to just go out and ACT like the version of yourself that you want to be. Fake it until you make it. Trust me, after kissing any girl your attracted to for a few seconds, your body will lead you the rest of the way.
*-By "evil ex" I don't mean that the woman is actually evil. That phrase is simply a short hand to emphasize that the experience with that woman has had a negative impact on your life.
You will never be able to reach your full potential until you first confront your deep seated fear of success. -Dr. Henry Killenger.