Direct approach questions

[Jon E]

Hi people,

I have a question for people who are experienced with doing direct approaches in the day.

I first started off doing indirect approaches/opinion openers at night, and in some day situations.I really like using them because
-It takes the pressure off them and allows me to do most of the talking for the beginning of our interaction
-It allows me to showcase my personality a bit, they can see that Im safe and a funny guy or whatever
-It gets us talking about a TOPIC rather than about us, i.e it helps avoid boring 'what do you do' questions

However I find in the day it feels a bit unnatural to go up to someone in the street and ask them an opinion opener, and it's harder to make it seem spontaneous.So I want to use direct openers more.

However, I've just done my first couple of direct approaches (basically saying 'hi I was just standing over there and I saw you, you look cool so I thought Id come and say hi'), and although it feels like a better way of opening, it presents some other problems.

After I've opened, I feel like the girl is taken aback a bit. She isnt running away but is obviously a bit cautious, and is probably trying to figure out if Im a weirdo or not.However I dont really know how to start the conversation so that it will be relaxed and she will feel comfortable.I find myself asking her lots of questions...this can be a bit awkward as it starts to feel like I am interviewing her, also it puts pressure on her as she doesnt know me and I am asking her all these questions about herself.

So what's a good way to initiate a relaxed conversation after a direct approach?Is there a way to do it that will enable me to do most of the talking at first, and help steer clear of boring rapport-seeking questions?

Also I have another small query- when I direct opened the girl today, she started quite obviously blushing!Is this a good thing or a bad thing???I should mention she was on her own, so it wasnt like something weird was happening to her in front of her friends.

I know its a bit of a long post, thanks for reading!

[Johnny]

Sounds like you did nothing wrong, blushing is a good sign and of course they are a little taken back, you have just performed a task that most women have only seen in movies. Keep it up

[diaton]

during the day you can always pretend you're on the phone and say "hey my buddy wants to know....." and then get an opinion and come back a minute or two later with a "this is what he said to that" comment. this requires your target not to be walking or moving too fast though.

i've never tried this, just a suggestion. trying to get into the right mindset to start doing this sort of thing myself.

[Jon E]

I guess I could do that, but it's making things complicated...also I've found in the daytime there is a smaller windown of time in which you can approach, usually if they are standing still they are waiting for somebody..so I cant really mess around with coming back 2 minutes later.

Also, it's a very bold thing to be direct, and I think that can only be a good thing!

[Bart S]

After you do it: 1) make an observation about the environment your in. (what is she doing there?) - "whats a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?"

2). Qualify her (is what you said true?) Banter: "You're a bad girl" (LOL, Can't be true).

3). Cold Read: Actually your opener was kind of a cold read. Except it was very generalized. (telling someone they seem cool is nice, but its not really saying a whole lot). So go for a more daring/insightful cold read.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=labhmXW5VUU&NR=1

Other than that, you just need to do some banter, cocky/funny, light hearted fluff, cuz you're still in the "attraction phase".